ComplainerMan

Dark Water is a 2005 “horror” movie starring the beautiful and always moody Jennifer Connolly. It’s a remake of a 2002 Japanese horror flick, called the same thing, but obviously in a different language. It is also a waste of 107 minutes of your life.

Problems:

1. It’s not scary. Unless you are OCD or hydrophopic. A lot of dirty water messing up the apartment. That’s about it.

2. No suspense. There are scenes where you could have had some startles to get your adreniline pumping at little, if they had been directed and edited properly. But apparently the director didn’t know how to do those. The DVD cover made mention of Alfred Hitchcock. Survey says: Buuzzzz.

3. Very familiar plot. Dead girl in water comes back to haunt someone. Think ”The Ring” but dull and not scary at all.

4. Stiff and phoney characters. You can’t tell if the building super is trying to be menacing, friendly or just confused. The teenage “tough guys” are as threatening as Opie and Goober.

The cast does include some good actors like John C. Reilly and Tim Roth, but they are wasted and can’t quite rise above the material. Touchstone made a profit of 19 million on the flick, so I guess the got the job done. Good work on a movie that sucked.